Sunday, December 18, 2016

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

The picture below is a quote by my aunt ,the excerpt written by Mom shows you the quality of person that came up with such a quote
"The quote hereunder is my sister-in-law's, an incredible person who, because of her unconditional love, her 24/7 hands-on care and Colin's unbelievable will to live, Shona, together with Hashem, gave my brother an additional seven years of life (at home!) beyond the prognosis, after being diagnosed with Multiple Systems Atrophy in its worst possible form. During the last seven years of his life Colin became locked inside his body - on a cathetar, on a respirator, fed by a peg in his stomach, lungs suctioned day & night - unable to move, talk ... nothing... except blink his eyes with difficulty, but fully cognitive at the same time. All one saw in their home was joy, humour and a celebration of life! Shona gave him the best quality of life possible! "

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Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Dr John Demartini
Circumstances may be likened to stones. You can use them to build on or you can let them weigh you down.

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training


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Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training


ואתם הדבקים בה' אלוקיכם חיים כולכם היום
Dr John Demartini
t see as part of your purpose feels pointless and the ratio of pointlessness to purposefulness is how much 'hell or heaven' you have in your life. The truth is that everything you do is connected.

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

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Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Dr John Demartini
It may seem that a situation is a loss without gain, destruction without construction, but this is not the whole truth, for ignorance blindly sees only one side.
History has taught us that out of the ashes rise great opportunities and that any challenge can be transformed when we know how to ask a new set of questions and shift our perceptions and then actions.

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Where focus goes energy flows a simple famous truth that can change your life instantly

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Are you an accident?
When it comes down to it there is a choice
If there is ( G-d forbid) no G-d then whatever justification you want to concoct you are an accident in the grand scheme of things and everything and everyone is random,simply results of a big bang ,no enduring meaning.
But if there is a G-d( There is) that is the entire Reality we live in then suddenly even the smallest thing has meaning even if you have no idea what it is.
A bigger picture is always in play ,everything you do means something and no matter how small or insignificant you think you are you matter and you mean something.
But that also means you are important enough to have a responsibility to live up to your totally unique authentic part in this bigger picture
And that is your life's journey,to discover your part in this bigger picture by starting to live it as much as you can day by day ,learn more growing, seeing , doing, keeping momentum, feeling alive.
This meaning has to find expression in your words, thoughts, actions reactions etc and every area of your life as your life is no longer random you have worth, infinite worth
So from being an insignificant random drop you are now part of the endless power of the ocean
You are a piece of the Master ..go live your Masterpiece

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training


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Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Finding Your Authentic connection to G-d,to Torah, to yourself
We are told in Pirkei Avot that one of the 48 ways to acquire Torah is Nosei B'ol Im Chaveri,Carrying the burden with your friend
How does this aid us in acquiring the Torah?
What does it mean to "acquire" the Torah?
When you acquire something it becomes personal,it becomes yours ,part of your life and thus impacts your life authentically
When you feel someone's pain,carry their burden with them,share at some level their experience ,it does not get more personal than that
You enter their world and in so doing your world changes,your filters change and the Torah you learn is digested differently,filtered differently,experienced differently,felt differently.....and your life changes.
In this way you expand, connect authentically to more than you,understanding that there is more than you in the world and in so doing truly connecting to the essence of Torah..living a life that never stops filling up with love,giving,caring ...always exploring the wonders of who you are and can be knowing that there is no limit as to how high and how far you can go , bringing the world up with you..touching and igniting the goodness and greatness in yourself and others from HaMakom(The Place),another of G-d's names...The Place of Love and all encompassing Oneness that is G-d

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Don't be a prisoner to the metaphors you hear and use--change them
my favorite excuse metaphor people use is "I am stuck"
Noone is ever stuck unless they are glued to the spot ,as long as G-d gives you another day there are always choices,options,possibilities,the ability to rethink,reevaluate etc

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Are you a J.E.R.K. or K.I.N.D.?
J.udges people at every turn
E.xpects people to act and react etc as he/she sees fit
R.ehashes, does not know when to drop it ,let go ,move on
K.now it all..without given space for others to be and express themselves
------------------ --------------- ----------------------- --------------
K.nowing and respecting differences between two people, two worlds
I.nterested in listening without trying to fix ,advise or solve , just being there for the person
N.ormalizing, helping people choose to feel good about themselves and life and see the good in themselves and life
D.etermined to access a state of mind that will allow gratitude, giving and goodness to ripple down into all what you do and say etc

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

This Rav Kook quote in my opinion hits the mark with all the people bashing especially those who bash other Rabbis instead of working on themselves
“The truly righteous do not complain about evil, but rather add justice; they do not complain about heresy, but rather add faith; they do not complain about ignorance, but rather add wisdom.”
In other words instead of complaining about darkness add light and then you and others will see much clearer.

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

"Knowledge has to be improved, challenged, and increased constantly, or it vanishes"
Peter Drucker

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Ten forbidden phrases of successful people
1. I cant
you cant only if you believe you cant
2.Not possible
Not possible only if you will not consider it
3.Its too difficult
Dont underestimate yourself
4.I dont have time.
We all find the time for whats important
5.when I am ready
noone is ever 100% ready
6.I will try
trying does nothing committing makes all the difference
7.what will others say?
Listen to others but go with what you know is right
8.Its too much
G-D gives you the strength to deal, face ,and over come whatever you need to
9.I dont have it in me
You never created you so its not your decision ,G-D created you with infinite potential..you dont have what you choose not to have
10.I have to be certain
If you dont take risks forward is a direction you will never know

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training


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Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Choose Life
וּבָחַרְתָּ בַּחַיִּים לְמַעַן תִּחְיֶה אַתָּה וְזַרְעֶךָ:
You shall choose life, so that you and your offspring will live;- Devarim-30:19
J. Hershy Worch
The Kotzker rebbe said, "I could revive the dead, no problem. It's reviving the living which is hard."

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Unleash Your Guru Within
In Sanskrit gu-means darkness ru- means dispel.
In other words a true guru is a person that dispels darkness and whether we acknowledge it or not we all have a beautiful unique authentic light our part of G-d , our soul.
No darkness can withstand the power of your unique Divinely forged light but you have to believe it so you open yourself up to achieve it and be a portal of blessing shining your light as only you can making in your own way the world a better place .

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

The Power of our thoughts extends to literally being able to change ourselves physiologically starting with the brain which Neuroplasticity explains
What Is Neuroplasticity
The good news is your brain makes physical changes based on the repetitive things you do and experiences you have. The bad news is your brain makes physical changes based on the repetitive things you do and experiences you have. This morphing capability of your brain, known as neuroplasticity, works both for you and against you.
Neuroplasticity, the ability of the brain to change structure and function based on input from repeated behaviors, emotions, and thoughts is an empowering truth of the last decade with far reaching implications and possibilities for almost every aspect of human life and culture. However, this same characteristic, making your brain amazingly resilient, also makes it very vulnerable to outside and internal, usually unconscious, influences.
Just in case you’ve managed to miss all the hype, neuroplasticity is an umbrella term referring to the ability of your brain to reorganize itself, both physically and functionally, throughout your life due to your environment, behavior, thinking, and emotions. The concept of neuroplasticity is not new and mentions of a malleable brain go all of the way back to the 1800s, but with the relatively recent capability to visually “see” into the brain allowed by functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI), science has confirmed this incredible morphing ability of the brain beyond a doubt.
The concept of a changing brain has replaced the formerly held belief that the adult brain was pretty much a physiologically static organ or hard-wired after critical developmental periods in childhood. While it’s true that your brain is much more plastic during the early years and capacity declines with age, plasticity happens all throughout your life.
How many times have you heard someone say or even said yourself, “That’s just the way I am” or “I was born this way”? Those statements may be true, but do not mean that the person is fated to stay that way forever. Contrary to what used to be believed and was a rather convenient excuse, our brains are not hardwired at any age. You’re not stuck with the brain you were born with.
When a craving is satisfied, dopamine, a feel good neurotransmitter, is released in the brain. The same shot of dopamine that makes you happy is an essential component to neuroplasticity and making neuronal connections which reinforce your behavior.So we have to be extremely of context ,what thoughts and activities we do because negatives which we allow to give us a good feeling also releases dopamine
Our brains are changing all the time in response to our behaviors, emotions, and thoughts whether for our benefit or not. To work consciously to harness this process, called self-directed neuroplasticity, can transform brains, lives, and the world for the better.
(taken from a variety of articles on neuroplasticity)

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Have you ever wondered what G-d "thinks" of you?
Obviously we can never know really but we can get some indication from the Torah that G-d has given us
וַיַּרְא אֱלֹקים אֶת כָּל אֲשֶׁר עָשָׂה וְהִנֵּה טוֹב מְאֹד וַיְהִי עֶרֶב וַיְהִי בֹקֶר יוֹם הַשִּׁשִּׁי-בראשית
And G-d saw all that " He" had done and behold it was very good, it was evening and it was morning, the sixth day- Bereishit
After G-d had just created man .. the purpose of Creation."He" said it was very good..what higher esteem can their be ?

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Many people have a long list of reasons to explain why they’re not doing what they love, but few of them objectively examine their reasons and look for underlying fears.
The reality is that there’s a hidden fear behind every imagined limitation.
As much as we may be tempted to blame other people or outside circumstances for our current condition in life, sooner or later we realize that we attract and create our own limitations.
Since we attract or create our own limitations, we can also break through them by learning to love them.
When you learn to love what you perceive to be a roadblock, you feel grateful for the lesson and the experience it represents.

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Mastering Your Feelings-Maximizing Your Life
----Never Allowing Your Feelings to Control You----
"תחת אשר לא עבדת את ה' בשמחה ובטוב לבב מרוב כל"
..because you did not serve Hashem in gladness /joy /happiness and goodness of heart when everything was abundant- Devarim 28:48
In other words because the nation of Israel did not serve Hashem with joy when things were abundant they were deserving of punishment?
The question is how you can you mandate feelings, what if any control do we have over our feelings?
Well,,, according to the Boss we do , so that means we can and you can't argue with the Manufacturer
Thus once we learn to master this skill life , no matter where you find yourself , takes on a new invigorating perspective
As people who feel better do better become better.....
You might not have any control of what you are living through, going through etc right now but you do have access to control over how you choose to feel about it and this pave the way to eventually getting ,with G-d's grace through it and out of it.
Those who feel good . do a lot more good

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Raise Your B.A.R.( Believe. Achieve. Receive)
I saw something similar to this robotic type surgery on one of the star trek episodes more than 20 years ago when in actuality it was not even a dream but yet if someone even in a sci -fi series could imagine it it can be achieved and here is the proof
So if this can happen for physical achievements can you begin to imagine what we are capable of as people ,what heights we can reach spiritually....we are only limited by what we refuse to believe

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Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training


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Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

The Thought Train- You Sell The Tickets
A thought that you allow to stay with you eventually becomes a belief which then takes over your self talk and then becomes habit which enters your auto response system and you forget about it giving birth to a paradigm which directs your life.
Be Vigilant Your Life Matters

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Your Mental Stamina Diet For The Week
Sunday
Resolve noto take anything personally the entire day no matter what.
Monday
Resolve that if you fall ,no matter the reason ,to get back up no matter how hard.
Tuesday
Take anything negative that happens to you and reframe it positively no matter what.
Wednesday
Resolve not to wallow at all for any reason no matter what,instead go through at least ten things and/ or people that you are grateful for
Thursday
Resolve not to think of past mistakes ,failures and any mistakes you make today,anything you think you failed at
totally embrace as an opportunity to learn
Friday
Resolve to see no matter how small only your successes,achievements etc and celebrate them
Shabbat
Resolve to be self....less the entire day ,making space for others,their quirks etc no matter how annoying,let them be themselves enjoy the whole person, experience them realizing when you are self ...less you become so much more.
May Hashem bless you with the will to make this diet a lifestyle on the way to realizing the power packed mental power Hashem as filled you with.

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Your Middah Diet For The Week
Sunday
No complaining at all at all for any reason the entire day
Monday
no excuses for anything at all for any reason the entire day
Tues
Dont criticize anyone at all for any reason the entire day
Wed
Dont insult ,name call,degrade etc anyone for any reason the entire day
Thursday
Don't put yourself down at all for any reason the entire day
Friday
Dont be negative at all for any reason the entire day
Shabbat
Dont ignore the needs of others at all
May Hashem bless you with the will to make this diet a lifestyle change for every single day

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

So many use the excuse "It is easier said than done."
Well of course because it is said not done...to have any chance at success we have to do.

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

Asking the right relevant, questions can often help people choose to discover so much about themselves and lead to amazing changes in their lives
Questions that Limit(closed questions)
Closed questions limit creativity. When we ask a question that includes an answer, the listener must respond to that answer, often with a “yes” or “no.” This type of question doesn’t cause a lot of reflection because the options for response are extremely limited in other words a closed question.
One reason we ask limiting questions is because we are stuck in our own perspective. We have ideas and when we form questions, those questions come out with our answers embedded in them.
Questions that Generate Possibilities(Open ended questions)
Ask questions that promote creativity and generate possibilities by asking more broadly about the topic. Begin your questions with the words: What, How, or Who.
These questions have unlimited possible answers. The listener is not merely saying “yes” or “no” to your idea. Questions with these words tend to produce more reflection and fuller answers . Most important, they stimulate the creativity and generate possibilities for the listener.
There is risk in doing this. The response to an open ended question can go in many different directions. Asking open ended questions require a coach to give up control of the response. But creativity and new possibilities only emerge when we move beyond what we know and think has to be and explore what could be.

Redemption Coaching - Life Skills Training

People are different and allowed to be even if you disagree so a critical skill to preserve relationships is to learn to
Express sensitively what you feel
Take nothing personally
Learn to let go of the issue, you dont have to force people to agree with you,that rarely gets people to do what they need to
Move on-an issue is never more important than a person(there are extreme exceptions)